lifestyle

Relationship Q&A

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Heyyyyy Blog fam,

I trust you guys have been keeping up with my Instagram (@ArdeenAleena) enough to know my absence from this blog is really caused by my terrible planning, 90% of my closet is on it’s way to Italy as I type this to you. Never fear though because the highly requesed relationship Q&A is here!

Some of you asked and now you all shall receive, thank you to everyone who sent me questions, Nick and I both had a blast working on this. Also, to those of you asking if you haven’t already figured it out, no we didn’t break up. Nick headed to Italy to start on his next assignment and I will hopefully join him shortly. I’m in the process of completing my American citizenship and once I have completed the process I can go get my man. I am currently in Mississippi at my parents home, working and counting the days till we’re reunited. Until then, enjoy the questions you all apparently wanted to know the answers to!

  • How long. Have you guys been together?
Nick; 2 Years, 4 Months, and 5 Days
Ardeen;  We’ve been together almost 2.5 years and known each other for almost 3.
 
  • Where was your first date?
N; This question needs some context prior to the answer. Basically, I’m going to make some excuses because I know there will be well placed criticism of the location. I usually like to go to a “nicer” restaurant on a first date, but I failed to do proper research. I wanted to go to a restaurant that was close to a coffee shop and one of the squares in Savannah. I figured if the date went well after dinner, we could walk around and maybe grab some coffee. I pulled up Google Maps to look for a place to meet that criteria and I figured Forsyth Park was a great location. Not sketchy. Close to other people. Semi-romantic. I found an American style restaurant close to a coffee shop, almost adjacent to the restaurant, and both were next to the park. I quickly looked at some reviews and it all looked good. Turns out that the place I choose, Betty’s Bombers, is burger dive. Food is ordered up front, kind of like fast food restaurant. Not my best showing….
A; Nick cringes at this question, I love it. Backstory, Nick likes to pick a fancier place for the first date just because he’s a nice person, he has really nice taste and that’s how he was raised. His idea was to pick a nice restaurant close to a coffee shop that was walking distance so I didn’t have to hop in his car on our first date, but also close to the squares and other stuff downtown. We ended up going to Betty Bombers which is a cute burger dive bar/place whatever you call it in Savannah. He was sad (which I didn’t know till maybe a year later)because he though he picked a terrible place, I had just gotten off work and rushed to get ready so I thought it was perfect. Needless to say, he asked me on a second date even after seeing me murder literally the biggest burger on the menu so it clearly was meant to be. I also told a little white lie and said Forsyth Park was almost as big as Central Park so we could continue our date because I was having fun getting to know him and wasn’t ready for the night to over.
 
  • What was your first impression of each other/what did you first notice about each other? 
N; As I saw her walking towards me, my first thoughts were basically she is as gorgeous as I thought she would be. However, my second impression was not at all what I was expecting. She had a British accent. It threw me for a loop and I waited for the right time to ask her where she was from. During the date (at Betty’s Bombers) I noticed that she seemed like she had a lot going on with school and work, but she was still in the moment having fun and smiling. Anytime she smiled or laughed I couldn’t help, but do the same. My last and most memorable impression is that she ordered the biggest burger on the menu and ate it like a champion. Not many women could have pulled that off.
A; I remember this like it was yesterday it was “Jesus he’s hot…please don’t be one of THOSE army guys lol” And he wasn’t/isn’t. The more we talked I realized he was really smart as well, like really smart and I panicked because it was only a matter of time before he figured out just how blonde I was.  
  • When was our first kiss?
N; Not as soon as Ardeen would have liked. Some may say I’m slow. Those who may say that are correct. I take my time. To be fair, I was constantly away for particular training operations so we couldn’t consistently see each other.
A;  I can hear him laughing at this question. St.Patties day in 2016…it came after a few dates and me swearing to my best friend he had no interest in me and just wanted to be friends. 
  • Who said I love you first?
N; Please reference above question. She did.


A; I did, after saying I wouldn’t because I knew he was about to leave. I was also drunk when I did it…on my 21st birthday and didn’t remember till the next day.
  • What’s each other’s favorite (alcoholic) drink?
N; Ugh, her drink is anything with tequila in it. Although it makes all my Hispanic friends happy, I don’t do too kindly with tequila.
A; He’s going to disagree but his is an old fashioned, I don’t care what he says.
Who’s the more aggressive one in your relationship?
N; This may be a lame answer, but I’d say we both have our moments. As Ardeen can attest, I can have my “protective” moments, just like she has with me. It largely depends how much we’ve had to drink.
A; That’s hard. We’re both pretty alpha so I think it just depends on the situation BUT I think he’ll always be a little bit more aggressive than I am. 
  • What do you guys argue about the most?
N; I want to say the Army. It’s a love/hate relationship. If I’m being reflective, it’s probably more closely related to how I communicate the Army’s needs and how it’s going to impact our relationship.
A; This is definitely a tie between my indecisiveness or my lack of navigation. I cannot read a map to save my life and he always wants me to navigate when he’s hangry which is literally a lose lose situation. He’s probably going to pick something else though
  • Do you guys have ‘a song’ ?
N; Head Over Boots, by Jon Pardi
 
A;  I don’t think we do, We send each other songs that remind us of each other I don’t know if it’s ‘ours’ but the first one he sent to me was ‘head over boots’ by Jon Pardi and we still jam out to it
  • Who’s more jealous?  
N; I don’t think either of us is really jealous, in the traditional sense. I think we are envious about certain elements of each other’s life, but, overall, we do our best to appreciate how good our lives are. I can tell you what I’m most jealous of. I’m jealous that Ardeen has a “Splenda Daddy” taking care of her.
A; Definitely me. No questions asked.
  • Why do you guys move so often?
N; I want to say the Army again, but I certainly have a part in this. There is a tremendous amount of opportunity in this organization. I’ve found that if you capitalize on opportunities, they begin to build on themselves. I have a series of short and long term goals and if I identify an opportunity I shoot for it. Opportunities absolutely come with sacrifices. It’s about how you manage them, but it also about how you view something. Many events in life are subjective. You get to decide the meaning. You can either take away the positives or negatives.
A; LOL, Army life, that’s just how it works. It’s a love hate relationship, a very small price to pay when we think about all the places we get to go with each other though.
  • Who’s each other’s celebrity crush?
N; Where to begin. Nick Jonas, Paul Walker (R.I.P), Price Harry (I just learned Michael B. Jordan was off the list). The latest Nick Jonas engagement really hit Ardeen hard, as this was the last of her celebrity crushes that are no longer single. I’m waiting in anticipation for a new celebrity crush to emerge. She assured me, it is coming……
 
A;  He’s in love with Nicki Minaj. Like doesn’t hear a word I’m saying when Nicki is on the radio type love. I’m sure he’ll have my list for you guys
  • When’s the wedding?
N; Uhhhh……when I ask! Also, we need to see when the Army says it’s okay.
 
A; This is a Nick question lol, he knows what’s up.
  • How do you guys stay in shape?
N; A lot of working out. We push each other to work out more, eat better, and take care of ourselves. Vita-gummies are an exceptionally important aspect too! They are delicious and I use Ardeen as an excuse to eat as many as I possibly can.
 
A; I used to be super athletic when I was younger and now the gym is like my escape from everything, I also like to eat so I have to workout lol. Nick feeds me vitamins too so it helps. It’s really just a matter of pushing each other, if he’s working out at 5am everyday I can’t afford to be sitting at home becoming a hippo.
  • How many kids do you want?
N; I want 6 and she wants 0. My guess is we will meet somewhere in the middle at 3. Or 6. You never know.
 
A; I’m undecided, Nick wants a football team though.
  • Where was our first road trip?
N; The first one I can remember is our trip to Harpers Ferry in West Virginia. We drove west of D.C. to go on a hike and enjoy the beauty of the Appalachian Mountains. This is where I learned that snakes enjoy Ardeen’s presence. There was a copperhead snake getting some sun, coiled up, and sitting next to her ankle. After that we left the mountain top and sat along the Potomac River and enjoyed the quaint historical town.
A; I really had to think about this one, I think our first actual long road trip together was to New York for thanksgiving…I think…it’s whatever Nick says.
  • How do you guys deal with being long distance? 
N; Trust. Being in a long distance relationship tests a relationship to its core. From my experience, long distance relationships are only successful if you can do the basic things right, like communication, etc. However, if you don’t have 100% trust that each other is committed to the relationship then it’ll likely fail. I trust Ardeen unequivocally. I’d also say that making the little things count are also very important. We maximize our time together and make every minute count.
A;  For me I really just cry a lot lol..I’m loosing but like not really. It’s really just a lot of communicating. We’ve spent more time apart than we have together for our entire relationship and the key has always been talking a lot, having each other in the loop and staying busy when each other isn’t around.
  • What’s your advice to other military couples?
N; Relationships in the military are not easy. There needs to be balance between work and family. You need to understand that the military is a part of your relationship and it has a vote in what you do, sometimes a large vote that neither of you want. Communicate your goals and desires with each other and determine a plan to achieve those goals. It’s not going to be easy, and sometimes you’ll fall short, but you’ll have that other person there to lay your head on when you are feeling weak and defeated.
 
A; Again, communicate until you literally can’t anymore it’s all you can do it’s really all you have. Learn to go with the flow because hardly anything will ever go to plan and, cherish all the time you have together no matter how much or how little.
  • Have we dated interracially before, is it different, if yes, how?
N; I was in a few short relationships while I was stationed in South Korea. At first, I thought there would be a difference in interracial dating, but I’ve learned that there isn’t a difference. I look for the same qualities in people, their skin color makes no difference. I fell in love with Ardeen’s wonderful personality and stunning beauty. Everyday I’m reminded how amazing she is and how lucky I’m able to be a part of her life. If one day she all of a sudden became purple, I’d love her all the same.
A; We both have. I wouldn’t really say it’s ‘different’ lol it just is what it is. Different how? I don’t know, I fell for Nick’s qualities and who he is as a person, maybe a little bit because of how big his biceps and chest are (ask all of his friends or anyone about this, it’s a thing okay!) but, I’ve never been like I’m not dating that person because they’re this, that’s crazy to me. If your souls mesh and your hearts do then it’s nobody’s business but your own. If I was busy focusing on the color of his skin instead of who he is, I would never have found my person.

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